Have you ever been talking with someone who holds a movie/book/show in high regard, only for you to tell them that you think it stinks? It's a hard situation, because most of the time the person is deeply offended by your hatred for the object of their affection. Look, I don't have anything against you personally, it's just that I disagree with your taste. And with the following movies, that awkward conversation rears its ugly head time and time again.
Inglorious Basterds
I really wish that I loved this movie; it would make life a lot easier. I love Tarantino. I quote Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs just as much as the next guy. But Inglorious Basterds as an entire film, is overrated. I even watched this movie multiple times to try and figure out what I was missing. Every part with Brad Pitt's crew is amazing- but they're only on screen for like 45 minutes. The rest of the time we get Tarantino-esque conversations between characters that are not near as interesting as "The Bear Jew" or "Aldo the Apache". I know that some of these dialogue scenes are vintage Tarantino, but I just felt like he was a bit overindulgent, which he has been known to do (does anyone like Death Proof?). It's not Tarantino's worst movie (ahem, Death Proof), but it's not in the same league as his classics.
Love, Actually
Love, Actually is one of the few movies that actually left me close to physical illness after seeing it. It is also always mentioned in "best romantic comedies" lists, which is mystifying. The amount of syrupy sweet story lines about love and relationships is nauseating. Admittedly romantic comedies are not my cup of tea, but I can appreciate the good ones from the bad. There are several that I've liked, a fact I don't mind admitting. But Love, Actually just has so much unnecessary over-the-top romance that I can't handle it. The one that especially irked me was the 10 year old kid who was "in love" with his classmate. Puppy love can be cute when done the right way (see Moonrise Kingdom), but here it is just the worst. This 10 year old would basically sell his soul to be with this girl, and performs one insane romantic gesture after another. It wasn't cute to me at all. Having extensive experience around kids through my times at church and working at a summer camp, I can tell you that not one ten year old boy cares at all about romance. They might "like" a girl, but this is usually manifested in putting a worm in her hair or pushing her down on the playground. You're telling me this kid is going to do a Ross-in-Friends-style stop her at the airport thing? Give me a break.The rest of the stories are boring to annoying, and I found myself wanting Love, Actually to be over as soon as it started. Problem is, IT'S 2 AND A HALF HOURS LONG! I'm calling way overrated on this one.
Crash
Most "movie people" already know that this film is the biggest stink-bomb to ever win Best Picture at the Academy Awards, but I still run into individuals who hold Crash in high regard. The only reason it even won was because most voters thought, "it's a little TOO edgy to choose Brokeback Mountain, so I'll just go with the movie that says racism is bad." The filmmakers bludgeon viewers over the head with the overly simplified message of, "EVERYONE IS RACIST ON THE INSIDE". Nothing is nuanced, it's all convenient, and it's just too much to handle.
Bridesmaids
This one gets me in trouble the most. And for the sake of not making that any worse, I'm going to be short. I just didn't think it was that funny. I think that the people in it are funny (Rebel Wilson, Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph), it just wasn't a great movie. There. Am I the worst person in the world?
There Will Be Blood
I've already written some thoughts on this movie, but allow me to reiterate: There Will Be Blood is boring and terrible. Here's what I have previously stated, and I stand by every word:
'There Will Be Blood, released in 2007, had all the hype in the
world. A critically acclaimed director, Hollywood acting great Daniel
Day-Lewis as the lead, and the promise of an engrossing tale of oil
prospecting at the turn of the century. Needless to say I was very
excited to see this movie in the theater. The opening scene was
extremely promising. Daniel Day-Lewis, struggling in an oil well, in an
amazing one man scene with no dialogue. After that is when things
started to turn south. For what seemed like the next 9 hours (in reality
it was only two and a half), absolutely NOTHING happened. Seriously,
there is nothing that happens. I understand that not all movies are
moved along by a traditional plot, and that there are other types of
films. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is a good example of a
film that is a character study. We see Benjamin from his birth to his
death. But in between there is growth, action, and love. In There Will Be Blood, there
is none of that. Day-Lewis' character is an evil curmudgeon in the last
scene, the exact same as he is in the first. There's no plot to speak
of, just some events, and then it ends. Was I supposed to be invested in
any of the characters? Was I supposed to care when anything happened?
About halfway through the movie I started to realize that my
expectations had gone horribly wrong. After the movie my friends and I
all had sheepish looks, none of us daring to be the first to say they
hated it. Someone finally piped up with a "that was kind of boring"
comment, finally giving the rest of us the ability to tell of how bored
we all were during the movie. A group behind me in the theater loudly
exclaimed, "this is boring crap!" and actually left the theater with an
hour left. True story. I wish I had been as bold as them. It most
certainly was boring crap. It was almost as if I could hear Anderson
behind me in the theater screaming, "THIS IS ART! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO
LIKE THIS!" I understand that I'm supposed to, the problem is that I
don't, not even in the slightest. Maybe I was confusing that with
Day-Lewis horribly overacted performance. It was as if Anderson told
him,"OK, if you yell and strain your face, it conveys emotion! Do this
EVERY time!" Yelling is not great acting, and that is the gist of
Day-Lewis' performance. He overacts like Calculon from Futurama.'
Friday, May 16, 2014
Friday, May 9, 2014
Top 10 Albums
I remember as a kid going to a music store and buying a new CD. I would hear a song on the radio, like it, then take a chance on the rest of the album. Sometimes you'd get lucky and find something great, other times you'd buy Astro Lounge by Smash Mouth. It was just a different time (cue old man voice). Now, people buy single songs, listen to them on YouTube or Spotify, and make playlists of their favorite songs. But I've always liked listening to an entire album and really getting a feel of the artist's work.
When thinking about making this, nostalgia plays a big part. A few of these albums I attach to fond memories from childhood and adolescence. And I don't think that is a bad thing. Music is powerful because it attaches to your life in snapshots from the past. I'll always remember traveling to Dallas with my parents to the Cotton Bowl while listening to Morning View by Incubus. I'll always think about mowing lawns while listening to Weezer (The Blue Album) in the summers. And I'll always embarrassingly look back on my teenage angst while listening to early John Mayer songs. I love these 10 albums for so many different reasons, but the main one being that the music is really good.
1. Jesus Freak by dc Talk
This one HAD to be number one. It was the first tape I ever bought, and the first CD I ever bought. The three vocalists in dc Talk, Kevin Max Smith, Michael Tait, and Toby Mac, combine for perfect harmonies throughout this album. If I said that I've listened to this album 1,000 times, that might be an underestimation. I can sing along with the gospel outro to "What Have We Become", the hilarious "Jesus Freak (Reprise)", and every raspy word of "Mrs. Morgan". Each listen reveals something greater to every song. The lyrics are beautifully faith affirming. They are honest expressions of the Christian life. Jesus Freak will always center me towards Christ in times of doubts/hardships/emptiness. On top of all of that, the catchy melodies grab me every time. I've seen a lot of concerts in my life, but a reunited dc Talk show is unequivocally number 1 on my wishlist.
2. The Beatles (The White Album) by The Beatles
The Beatles basically introduced me into really liking music, not just radio pop. My older cousins were way into The Beatles, so of course I had to be. If you think that the "Greatest Band Ever" moniker that gets attached to them is overblown, well, you're wrong. The White Album is a sprawling opus, 30 songs of pop, hard rock, psychedelic, and downright bizarre, happy songs. "Happiness is a Warm Gun" is generally my answer to the "favorite Beatles song" question. This album meanders in terms of tempo, song structure and subject matter, but it's scope is what draws me in. I love the simple beauty of "Blackbird", the hilarity of "Piggies", and the bombastic "Helter Skelter". There's a reason that I still wear my Sgt. Pepper's t-shirt I got in 9th grade. The Beatles are the best of all time.
3. Morning View by Incubus
After Jesus Freak, this was the next album I bought as a kid, and my choice was sound. I went through a phase in 9th grade where I was OBSESSED with this band. I bought every album, EP, watched every DVD and every band interview. There are so many great melodies and "chill out" songs on this album that I go back to it monthly. And "Wish You Were Here" was my go to song for when I had a crush on a girl but was terrified to talk to her as a 13 year old. I finally saw Incubus in concert in 2012, and it was a culmination of many years of love for the band.
4. Whatever & Ever Amen by Ben Folds Five
From the time I was 5 until 12, my parents forced me to take piano lessons. For whatever reason, I just couldn't stand it. Practice time on my own was essentially 30 minutes of torture. At 12, I finally convinced my parents to let me quit in favor of football. After playing for 7 years and only walking away with a couple of creaky knees, I clearly made the wrong choice. Playing piano is AWESOME, and part of the reason this is true is Ben Folds. The dude is an animal on the keys. I know that Elton John pretty well invented "piano rock", but Ben Folds Five brought it back. Whatever & Ever Amen is their best, not only because it had their biggest hit, "Brick", but because the pop rock melodies on every song are terrific. Folds is a master lyricist, with the ability to be poignant, ironic, and funny from song to song. When I discovered this album my freshman year of college, I didn't even bother playing anything else on my iPod. Ben Folds, in whatever he does, is the man.
5. In Rainbows by Radiohead
I legally paid 0 dollars for this album. When it was released, Radiohead let people pay what they wanted through their website to download. As a broke college student, I decided to have it for free, but it was worth so much more. Probably the best album as an introduction to Radiohead, this album combines everything from the band's catalog into 10 songs. Tom Yorke goes major falsetto on "Reckoner", "Jigsaw Falling Into Place", and pretty much every other song, and it works each time.
6. Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers
Not only does this album not have a single skip, but I like every song equally, a rare feat for an album. Deep cuts like "Emit Remmus" and "Right On Time" are just as good as mega hits like "Californication" and "Otherside". I played so much Nintendo Gamecube while listening to this album it's unreal. Californication is the perfect summer album, and even at the mention of the word I think of sunshine and swimming poools and wiffle ball.
7. Pinkerton by Weezer
If I had two words to describe Pinkerton, it would be "embarrassingly honest." Rivers Cuomo's lyrics on this album are a raw look at the inner torment he faced after the explosion of his band's first album, Weezer (The Blue Album). He writes of loneliness on "Across the Sea" in a personal way he probably almost regrets, but I sure don't. I appreciate the honesty that breathes on every song, not to mention the lovely hooks that Weezer is known for. Originally panned by fans and critics alike upon release, Pinkerton is now seen as a classic by most in the music media, and I must wholeheartedly agree.
8. Continuum by John Mayer
John Mayer is exceptionally talented, and it is no more evident than on Continuum, a bluesy pop album that is easily my favorite he's ever made. The lyrics are soulful, and the guitar work is masterful. I love "Stop This Train" a song about growing up (subject matter that will always and forever be relate-able). I love "Slow Dancing in a Burning Room", a blues song about a dying relationship. John might be a big weirdo creep that's trying to be too much like Bob Dylan these days, but on Continuum, he was perfect.
9. Tourist History by Two Door Cinema Club
I'm a sucker for a catchy pop-rock song, and Tourist History is basically 10 songs of exactly that. Each song is short, effortless, and will stick in your head for days. "Undercover Martyn", "I Can Talk", and "This is the Life" are incredible highlights from this one. Any time I'm not really sure what I feel like listening to, I will put on Tourist History, because no matter my mood it always satisfies.
10.The Head and the Heart by The Head and the Heart
Another album that heavily features piano, and another 10 catchy pop-rock songs. The trio of singers that lead this band create some of the prettiest harmonies in music, and they are just dripping with them in every song. "Rivers and Roads" might be one of the most fun road trip songs every written. So many times have I sung the lyrics at the top of my lungs with every other person in the car on an interstate. Just like Tourist History, this album is right up my alley because it is pure catchy pop-rock. Unlike others, however, I never get tired of The Head and the Heart.
Honorable Mention:
Brothers by The Black Keys
Kid A by Radiohead
Is This It? by The Strokes
Youth and Young Manhood by Kings of Leon
Funeral by Arcade Fire
Stadium Arcadium by Red Hot Chili Peppers
OK Computer by Radiohead
Weezer (The Blue Album) by Weezer
Third Eye Blind by Third Eye Blind
Only By the Night by Kings of Leon
Aim And Ignite by fun.
Led Zeppelin III by Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin IV by Led Zeppelin
The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner by Ben Folds Five
A Crow Left of the Murder... by Incubus
Fleet Foxes by Fleet Foxes
Channel Orange by Frank Ocean
Graduation by Kanye West
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band by The Beatles
Abbey Road by The Beatles
Cease to Begin by Band of Horses
Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga by Spoon
Parachutes by Coldplay
When thinking about making this, nostalgia plays a big part. A few of these albums I attach to fond memories from childhood and adolescence. And I don't think that is a bad thing. Music is powerful because it attaches to your life in snapshots from the past. I'll always remember traveling to Dallas with my parents to the Cotton Bowl while listening to Morning View by Incubus. I'll always think about mowing lawns while listening to Weezer (The Blue Album) in the summers. And I'll always embarrassingly look back on my teenage angst while listening to early John Mayer songs. I love these 10 albums for so many different reasons, but the main one being that the music is really good.
1. Jesus Freak by dc Talk
This one HAD to be number one. It was the first tape I ever bought, and the first CD I ever bought. The three vocalists in dc Talk, Kevin Max Smith, Michael Tait, and Toby Mac, combine for perfect harmonies throughout this album. If I said that I've listened to this album 1,000 times, that might be an underestimation. I can sing along with the gospel outro to "What Have We Become", the hilarious "Jesus Freak (Reprise)", and every raspy word of "Mrs. Morgan". Each listen reveals something greater to every song. The lyrics are beautifully faith affirming. They are honest expressions of the Christian life. Jesus Freak will always center me towards Christ in times of doubts/hardships/emptiness. On top of all of that, the catchy melodies grab me every time. I've seen a lot of concerts in my life, but a reunited dc Talk show is unequivocally number 1 on my wishlist.
2. The Beatles (The White Album) by The Beatles
The Beatles basically introduced me into really liking music, not just radio pop. My older cousins were way into The Beatles, so of course I had to be. If you think that the "Greatest Band Ever" moniker that gets attached to them is overblown, well, you're wrong. The White Album is a sprawling opus, 30 songs of pop, hard rock, psychedelic, and downright bizarre, happy songs. "Happiness is a Warm Gun" is generally my answer to the "favorite Beatles song" question. This album meanders in terms of tempo, song structure and subject matter, but it's scope is what draws me in. I love the simple beauty of "Blackbird", the hilarity of "Piggies", and the bombastic "Helter Skelter". There's a reason that I still wear my Sgt. Pepper's t-shirt I got in 9th grade. The Beatles are the best of all time.
3. Morning View by Incubus
After Jesus Freak, this was the next album I bought as a kid, and my choice was sound. I went through a phase in 9th grade where I was OBSESSED with this band. I bought every album, EP, watched every DVD and every band interview. There are so many great melodies and "chill out" songs on this album that I go back to it monthly. And "Wish You Were Here" was my go to song for when I had a crush on a girl but was terrified to talk to her as a 13 year old. I finally saw Incubus in concert in 2012, and it was a culmination of many years of love for the band.
4. Whatever & Ever Amen by Ben Folds Five
From the time I was 5 until 12, my parents forced me to take piano lessons. For whatever reason, I just couldn't stand it. Practice time on my own was essentially 30 minutes of torture. At 12, I finally convinced my parents to let me quit in favor of football. After playing for 7 years and only walking away with a couple of creaky knees, I clearly made the wrong choice. Playing piano is AWESOME, and part of the reason this is true is Ben Folds. The dude is an animal on the keys. I know that Elton John pretty well invented "piano rock", but Ben Folds Five brought it back. Whatever & Ever Amen is their best, not only because it had their biggest hit, "Brick", but because the pop rock melodies on every song are terrific. Folds is a master lyricist, with the ability to be poignant, ironic, and funny from song to song. When I discovered this album my freshman year of college, I didn't even bother playing anything else on my iPod. Ben Folds, in whatever he does, is the man.
5. In Rainbows by Radiohead
I legally paid 0 dollars for this album. When it was released, Radiohead let people pay what they wanted through their website to download. As a broke college student, I decided to have it for free, but it was worth so much more. Probably the best album as an introduction to Radiohead, this album combines everything from the band's catalog into 10 songs. Tom Yorke goes major falsetto on "Reckoner", "Jigsaw Falling Into Place", and pretty much every other song, and it works each time.
6. Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers
Not only does this album not have a single skip, but I like every song equally, a rare feat for an album. Deep cuts like "Emit Remmus" and "Right On Time" are just as good as mega hits like "Californication" and "Otherside". I played so much Nintendo Gamecube while listening to this album it's unreal. Californication is the perfect summer album, and even at the mention of the word I think of sunshine and swimming poools and wiffle ball.
7. Pinkerton by Weezer
If I had two words to describe Pinkerton, it would be "embarrassingly honest." Rivers Cuomo's lyrics on this album are a raw look at the inner torment he faced after the explosion of his band's first album, Weezer (The Blue Album). He writes of loneliness on "Across the Sea" in a personal way he probably almost regrets, but I sure don't. I appreciate the honesty that breathes on every song, not to mention the lovely hooks that Weezer is known for. Originally panned by fans and critics alike upon release, Pinkerton is now seen as a classic by most in the music media, and I must wholeheartedly agree.
8. Continuum by John Mayer
John Mayer is exceptionally talented, and it is no more evident than on Continuum, a bluesy pop album that is easily my favorite he's ever made. The lyrics are soulful, and the guitar work is masterful. I love "Stop This Train" a song about growing up (subject matter that will always and forever be relate-able). I love "Slow Dancing in a Burning Room", a blues song about a dying relationship. John might be a big weirdo creep that's trying to be too much like Bob Dylan these days, but on Continuum, he was perfect.
9. Tourist History by Two Door Cinema Club
I'm a sucker for a catchy pop-rock song, and Tourist History is basically 10 songs of exactly that. Each song is short, effortless, and will stick in your head for days. "Undercover Martyn", "I Can Talk", and "This is the Life" are incredible highlights from this one. Any time I'm not really sure what I feel like listening to, I will put on Tourist History, because no matter my mood it always satisfies.
10.The Head and the Heart by The Head and the Heart
Another album that heavily features piano, and another 10 catchy pop-rock songs. The trio of singers that lead this band create some of the prettiest harmonies in music, and they are just dripping with them in every song. "Rivers and Roads" might be one of the most fun road trip songs every written. So many times have I sung the lyrics at the top of my lungs with every other person in the car on an interstate. Just like Tourist History, this album is right up my alley because it is pure catchy pop-rock. Unlike others, however, I never get tired of The Head and the Heart.
Honorable Mention:
Brothers by The Black Keys
Kid A by Radiohead
Is This It? by The Strokes
Youth and Young Manhood by Kings of Leon
Funeral by Arcade Fire
Stadium Arcadium by Red Hot Chili Peppers
OK Computer by Radiohead
Weezer (The Blue Album) by Weezer
Third Eye Blind by Third Eye Blind
Only By the Night by Kings of Leon
Aim And Ignite by fun.
Led Zeppelin III by Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin IV by Led Zeppelin
The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner by Ben Folds Five
A Crow Left of the Murder... by Incubus
Fleet Foxes by Fleet Foxes
Channel Orange by Frank Ocean
Graduation by Kanye West
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band by The Beatles
Abbey Road by The Beatles
Cease to Begin by Band of Horses
Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga by Spoon
Parachutes by Coldplay
Friday, April 11, 2014
Arkansas Levels of Losing: The Agony of Being a Hog
As Arkansas fans, we
know what losing is all about. And not just losing, but terrible, catastrophic,
heartbreaking, soul crushing losing. Bill Simmons wrote a column many years ago detailing the “levels” of
each loss, or a gauge for how much a loss truly hurts. With so many colossal
losses in my lifetime, applying his theory to the Razorbacks was (sadly) all
too easy. The Arkansas levels of losing:
The 13 Levels of
Losing
Arkansas Edition
(1998-Present)
Level XIII: The Princeton Principle
Definition (From Simmons): When a Cinderella team hangs tough
against a heavy favorite, but the favorite somehow prevails in the end (like
Princeton almost toppling Georgetown in the '89 NCAAs) ... this one stings
because you had low expectations, but those gritty underdogs raised your hopes
... also works for boxing, especially in situations like Balboa-Creed I
("He doesn't know it's a damn show! He thinks it's a damn fight!")
... the moment that always sucks you in: in college hoops, when they show shots
of the bench scrubs leaping up and down and hugging each other during the
"These guys won't go away!" portion of the game, before the collapse
at the end.
2005 Arkansas-LSU football
The Hogs were bad
that year. At quarterback it was a revolving door of Robert Johnson and Casey
Dick. But for some reason, this 4-6 team found themselves locked in a battle at
#3 LSU. This was a quintessential “Houston Nutt choke game”. I’ll never forget
Arkansas scoring late in the game and him immediately call a nervous timeout to
figure out what our 2-point play would be. They didn’t make it, and eventually
lost 19-17.
Level XII: The Achilles' Heel
Definition: This defeat transcends the actual game,
because it revealed something larger about your team, a fatal flaw exposed for
everyone to see ... flare guns are fired, red flags are raised, doubt seeps
into your team ... usually the beginning of the end (you don't fully comprehend
this until you're reflecting back on it).
2011 Arkansas-Alabama football
With ridiculously
high expectations, Tyler Wilson and the Hogs went in undefeated into an early
season matchup at top 10 Alabama. They exposed the Razorbacks. As a fan, I
realized that the offensive line couldn’t hold up with the big boys. Receivers
got mauled all day. The running backs couldn’t get anything going. After that game Arkansas won 7 straight, but
no one really believed they could hang with LSU at the end. Arkansas lost that
game big too, and finished 10-2, but it felt like those
two losses counted double. At 10-2, the Hogs were a DISTANT third place to LSU
and Alabama.
Level XI: The Alpha Dog
Definition: It might have been a devastating loss,
but at least you could take solace that a superior player made the difference
in the end ... unfortunately, he wasn't playing for your team ... you feel more
helpless here than anything ... for further reference, see any of MJ's games in
the Finals against Utah ('97 and '98).
2010 Arkansas-Auburn football
Yes Arkansas lost
Ryan Mallett, and yes there were the two bad fumble calls; but Cam Newton
scored over 60 points. I’ll never forget Verne Lundquist’s gushing when he
scrambled for a touchdown run (“Look at THAT!”). Arkansas has always had
trouble with running QB’s over the years (Andre Woodson, Terrelle Pryor), but
Newton torched them, just like he did everyone.
Level X: The Rabbit's Foot
Definition: Now we're starting to get into
"Outright Painful" territory ... this applies to those frustrating
games and/or series where every single break seemingly goes against your team
... unbelievably frustrating ... you know that sinking, "Oh, God, I've
been here before" feeling when something unfortunate happens, when your
guard immediately goes shooting up? ... yeah ... I'm wincing just writing about
it.
2003 Arkansas-Auburn football
Arkansas had not
one, not two, but THREE critical holding penalties that affected the outcome.
It was a low scoring game, and I distinctly remember both Matt Jones and Cedric
Cobbs getting touchdown runs called back. The final score was 10-3, to make
things worse. You know things are going against you when 14 points are taken
off the board.
Level IX: The Sudden Death
Definition: Is there another fan experience quite
like overtime hockey, when every slap shot, breakaway and centering pass might
spell doom, and losing feels 10 times worse than winning feels good (if that
makes sense)? ... there's only one mitigating factor: when OT periods start
piling up and you lose the capacity to care anymore; invariably you start
rooting for the game to just end, just so you don't suffer a heart attack
2002 Arkansas-Tennessee football (6OT)
After an improbable
90+ yard touchdown pass from Matt Jones to Richard Smith, the Razorbacks
somehow found themselves in OT at #10 Tennessee. But several Brendan O’Donnohoe
missed kicks and a dominating performance by Jason Witten doomed them to a loss
in 6OT’s. This was the first example of “over-conservative Houston Nutt
overtime coaching” coming in to play. When the Vols didn’t score with their
opportunity, what would Nutt do? Run it three times up the middle for 1 yard
and miss a 41 yard field goal. I felt like he did this a million times during
his tenure.
Level VIII: Dead Man Walking
Definition: Applies to any playoff series when your
team remains "alive," but they just suffered a loss so
catastrophic and so harrowing that there's no possible way they can
bounce back ... especially disheartening because you wave the white flag mentally,
but there's a tiny part of you still holding out hope for a miraculous momentum
change ... so you've given up, but you're still getting hurt, if that makes
sense.
2012 Arkansas-South Carolina baseball, College World
Series semi-final game 1
I didn’t get to
actually watch this game, but once the Hogs lost this one, it felt like they had
no chance to win the second one. The strength of the team was pitching, and the
bats literally did nothing in these two games. When the other team has to beat
you twice and they are probably the better team, losing the first game is a
death blow.
2008 Arkansas-Missouri Cotton bowl
This one is not so
much about a game that did it, but after Houston Nutt’s departure, this team
had NOTHING to play for. DMAC and Felix were basically in the NFL, crazy man
Reggie Herring was the coach, and Missouri put a whipping on the Hogs.
Superstar Tony Temple (?) rushed for over 300 yards. That team lost before they
arrived in Dallas.
Level VII: The Monkey Wrench
Definition: Any situation where either A) the
manager/coach of your team made an idiotic game decision, or B) a
referee/umpire robbed your team of impending victory ... the Monkey Wrench game
gains steam as the days and months roll along
2009 Arkansas-Florida football
We all remember how
much this one hurt. Tim Tebow on CBS meant that Florida was going to get all
the calls. Let’s get the two less egregious ones out of the way. During
Florida’s comeback, there were two HORRIBLE pass interference calls; a
defensive one on Arkansas, and a no-call offensive pass interference in the end
zone on Florida. But the worst was the Malcolm Sheppard personal foul call on
the game winning drive that is probably the worst flag I’ve ever seen thrown in
an Arkansas game. That crew got suspended because of it, and Florida won the
game almost single-handedly because of that call.
Level VI: The Full-Fledged Butt-Kicking
Definition: Sometimes you can tell right away when it
isn't your team's day ... and that's the worst part, not just the epiphany but
everything that follows -- every botched play, every turnover, every instance
where someone on your team quits, every "deer in the headlights"
look, every time an announcer says, "They can't get anything going,"
every shot of the opponents celebrating, every time you look at the score and
think to yourself, "Well, if we score here and force a turnover, maybe
we'll get some momentum," but you know it's not going to happen,
because you're already 30 points down ... you just want it to end, and it won't
end ... but you can't look away ... it's the sports fan's equivalent to a
three-hour torture session.
2005 Arkansas-USC football
Leinart, Bush,
White, and Smith absolutely drubbed the Hogs in the most lopsided Arkansas loss
I can ever remember. 70-17. USC scored 70 points!! I’ll never forget watching
the team run into the Coliseum and thinking to myself “these guys are terrified
to be here.”
2008 Arkansas-North Carolina basketball
As a 9-seed, the
Hogs handled Eric Gordon and 8th seeded Indiana in the first round.
Next up was mammoth North Carolina, starring Tyler Hansbrough. As I remember
it, North Carolina shot 100% in the first half, and could have beaten the Hogs
by 200 points. Any time Arkansas would make two shots in a row, UNC would make
12. A total butt kicking from start to finish.
Level V: The "This Can't Be Happening" Game
The sibling of the Full-Fledged Butt-Kicking ... you're
supposed to win, you expect to win, the game is a mere formality ... suddenly
your team falls behind, your opponents are fired up, the clock is ticking and
it dawns on you for the first time, "Oh my God, this can't be
happening."
2012 Arkansas- Louisiana Monroe
I don’t think many
rational fans really believed that Arkansas was a top 10 team after the
departure of Bobby Petrino, but Arkansas found themselves there in week 2. A
simple tune-up game with Sun Belt foe Louisiana-Monroe was all that stood
between the Hogs and a matchup with number 2 Alabama, and a likely College
Gameday visit. Tyler Wilson went down late in the first half, and after a
Brandon Allen-led touchdown drive, the Hogs didn’t score again. I remember
thinking early in the 4th quarter for the first time ,”wait, this
game is actually close!” Monroe’s QB looked like a superstar, and they won in
OT. After that? The season went into full-on John L. Smith-style meltdown mode.
SMILE!
2014 Arkansas-Alabama basketball
Level IV: The Broken Axle
Definition: When the wheels come flying off in a big
game, leading to a complete collapse down the stretch ... you know when it's
happening because A) the home crowd pushes their team to another level, and B)
the team that's collapsing becomes afflicted with Deer-In-The-Headlitis ...
it's always fascinating to see how teams bounce back from the Broken Axle Game
... by the way, nobody has been involved in more Broken Axle games than Rick
Adelman.
2006 Arkansas-LSU
This was a close,
heart breaking loss in Little Rock after the team had reeled off 10 straight
victories and was headed to the SEC championship game. A Trindon Holliday kick
return for a touchdown sealed the deal for LSU. Arkansas had the ball down 1
score with two minutes left, but their pass offense was so punchless there was
no chance. After this, the Hogs lost to Florida (Reggie Fish play) and
Wisconsin (most boring game ever) and ended the season with three straight
losses. What really hurts is that in hindsight, wins over LSU and Florida would
have put them in the National Championship game. D’oh.
Level III: The Guillotine
Definition: This one combines the devastation of the
Broken Axle game with sweeping bitterness and hostility ... your team's hanging
tough (hell, they might even be winning), but you can feel the inevitable
breakdown coming, and you keep waiting for the guillotine to drop, and you just
know it's coming -- you know it -- and when it finally comes, you're
angry that it happened and you're angry at yourself for contributing to
the debilitating karma ... these are the games when people end up whipping
their remote controls against a wall or breaking their hands while pounding a
coffee table ... too many of these and you'll end up in prison.
2013 Arkansas-LSU football
Sitting at 3-8 and a
shocking 0-7 in conference there was no way the Hogs were going to win this one
right? RIGHT?! Right. After entering the fourth quarter with a 27-21 lead and a
surprisingly efficient game from Brandon Allen, LSU cut the game to 24-27, then
got the ball down 3 with just a few minutes left. On their own 1 yard line.
WITH THEIR BACKUP QUARTERBACK TAKING HIS FIRST SNAPS OF THE GAME. At this point
I could just envision it happening, the eventual touchdown in some improbable
way that would lead to a loss. Blown coverage, 49 yard touchdown pass, game
over, spirit defeated.
Level II: The Stomach Punch
Definition: Now we've
moved into rarefied territory, any roller-coaster game that ends with A) an
opponent making a pivotal (sometimes improbable) play, or B) one of your guys
failing in the clutch ... usually ends with fans filing out after the game in
stunned disbelief, if they can even move at all ... always haunting, sometimes
scarring ... there are degrees to the Stomach Punch Game, depending on the
situation .
2011 Arkansas-Ohio State
football
Three words: scoop and score. Don’t really have to say anything else.
2010 Arkansas-Alabama football
I have never been more excited for a game, and then so devastated. The
craziest Arkansas crowd ever couldn’t overcome the Nick Saban mojo. The Hogs
led most of the game, starting with a heart attack inducing Ronnie Wingo
touchdown catch on the first drive, but couldn’t hang on. Two crucial Ryan
Mallett picks in the fourth were instrumental in the loss. After this one, I
went home and had several Mike’s Hard Lemonades. Yeah, it was that bad.
2006 Arkansas-Florida football
“The Reggie Fish Play”. Is there any Arkansas fan that doesn’t wince when
they hear this guy’s name? With the Hogs up 21-17, they had forced
Florida to punt, and ALL the momentum was on their side. I was there in the
Georgia dome, and the crowd was probably 70-30 in favor of Florida, but you
wouldn’t have known it then. The Arkansas fans were going crazy, and the team
was poised to take over. But then: The Reggie Fish Play. For some insane
reason, Fish felt like he needed to try and field the punt over his shoulder on
his own goal line. He obviously fumbled, and Florida recovered for a touchdown.
The game was only 24-21 at that point, but it was over. The Hogs had the life
sucked out of them and lost 38-28.
Level I: That Game
Definition: Game 6 of the 1986 World Series ... one
of a kind ... given the circumstances and the history involved here, maybe the
most catastrophic sports loss of our lifetime.
1998 Tennessee-Arkansas football
My most vivid
Arkansas sports memory, and also the worst. Top 10 ranked, 8-0 Arkansas was
playing at #1, 8-0 Tennessee. With less than two minutes to go, the Hogs had
the ball at midfield and were up 24-22, essentially trying to run the clock
out. Clint Stoerner, who had been great all year, tripped over All-American
Brandon Burlsworth’s leg and tried to prop himself up with the football, and
instead fumbled. Tennessee recovered, stormed down the field, and won the game.
The loss was devastating. Arkansas kicker Todd Latourette went out and got a
DWI, submarining the team’s chances at Mississippi State the next week. At 9
years old, I will never forget going back to my parent’s room and balling my
eyes out. I just went back and watched the clip on YouTube, and had PTSD style
flashbacks. For any Arkansas fan, I don’t recommend watching it.
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Top Ten of 2013
It's been quite a long time since my last blog post. Back in July, I wrote about Arrested Development, and have not done a movie review or any other post since. I think that watching films and thinking about what I was going to write was lessening my enjoyment of them. I distinctly remember watching Star Trek Into Darkness and thinking, "What in the world am I even going to write about? This is just a sci-fi action movie, that's it. What else is there to say?" Maybe this is an indication that as much as I like to watch movies, talk about them, read about them, and analyze them, writing about them for a living would become tedious and depreciate my enjoyment. 2013 had many great movies, and I've been thinking about what my top 10 would be recently, so I decided to revisit this page. I'm not sure if I'll get back to reviewing movies any time soon, but I still love to write and can hopefully find a place for it in my life. Until then, enjoy my top 10 of 2013! These are the only posts that anyone reads anyway, straight up lists. Thanks BuzzFeed!
1. Gravity
Gravity is the reason why movie theaters still exist. The film is as gripping and intense a movie experience as any I have ever seen. Gravity uses the entirety of the screen to create a sense of isolation and dark out in the vastness in space. But not just a technical achievement, the film also has an emotionally resounding story involving the spiritual rebirth of Sandra Bullock's character. Her performance is an impressive near one-woman feat, as she spends almost 95% of the film on screen. I think that I ate maybe 2 handfuls of the popcorn I had during this movie; that's how high the intensity is. Usually I've chomped through the bucket before the opening credits can finish. Gravity will suck you in and not let go for an amazing 90 minutes.
2. Her
Emotionally complex and strange, Her is one of the most unique and inventive movies I've ever seen. Joaquin Phoenix, acting mostly alone on screen, falls in love with his "OS", or an artificially intellegent computer system. The film is neither championing or demonizing this type of relationship. It merely explores what our not too distant future looks like, and that the need for interaction in any form is something that humans will always crave. Director Spike Jonze normalizes the fact that people can gain emotional attachments based on text or voice alone, and not just in the stupid Catfish type way. People are using their computers to fall in love every day; what if the computer could be the one to fall in love with? Her will leave you pondering the nature of relationships and technology for a long time.
3. American Hustle
If you want to talk about a movie that is overloaded with talent, look no further. Directed by David O. Russell, and starring Christian Bale, Bradley Cooper, Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence, Louis C.K., and Jeremy Renner, American Hustle absolutely deserves all of its Oscar nominations for acting. The film is cool, sexy, and fast in all the right places. Bale playing such an iconic character like Batman for so long kind of made me forget how he is one of the best actors working today. American Hustle is one of those Forrest Gump/Ferris Bueller's Day Off type movies. EVERYONE will like it when they see it.
4. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Ah, The Hobbit. The book version is my favorite book of all time. Tolkien's adventure novel is pefect in almost every way, and I have read it many times. The films at first were very difficult for me to judge. They are totally different in tone than the book, which initially was off putting for me. However once realizing that these movies are more about creating prequels to The Lord of the Rings, something Tolkien's book never did, I began to enjoy them for what they are. The second installment of the prequel trilogy is just as impressive an adventure as the first, with a few unnecessary detours that brought it down a tick. The initial scene between Maritn Freeman's Bilbo and Smaug (voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch) is a high mark for not only this trilogy, but for The Lord of the Rings as well.
5. Pacific Rim
"A movie about giant monsters and robots made your top 10? Are you insane?" That's probably what you're thinking right now, but Pacific Rim is the epitome of a great action film. If a director decided to combine Godzilla and Transformers, but actually make them not suck, Pacific Rim would be the result. Plus look at the cast! Stringer Bell! Jax Teller! Charlie Kelly! Hellboy! The cast was basically an all star lineup of my favorite TV shows, which probably made it even more enjoyable for me. I readily admit that this film will not be for everybody, and shouldn't win any Oscars, but as a sci-fi action film? It's darn near perfect.
6. Elysium
District 9 was one of the most inventive science fiction films of the last 20 years, and director Neill Blomkamp's second film is a worthy follow up. The futurstic world envisioned is creative and depressing, but the story is one of hope. Matt Damon is great as the hero, but Sharlto Copley's villain steals every scene he is in. As far as sci-fi action movies go, Elysium is top notch.
7. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
Ben Stiller has only directed a few films (The Cable Guy, Zoolander, Tropic Thunder), and has never made one with any sort of emotional resonance, but Mitty finds a way to be funny and heartfelt. The story of a "boring" man taking an adventure is not really anything new, but Stiller plays the title character with such warmth that his story is endearing. The film really shines in its Indie soundtrack and how well it is shot and framed.
8. 42
Jackie Robinson is an American hero, and 42 is a faithful adaptation of his life. The film doesn't really take any risks except for the realistic rendering of the berating he takes at the hands of an opposing manager, played by Alan Tudyk. Jackie is one of my favorite athletes of all time, and his contribution to baseball and sports cannot be understated. Could you imagine watching professional sports that only had a bunch of white guys playing?
9. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Has there ever been a time in movie history where an actress is the lead of the biggest blockbuster film franchise, AND is perenially nominated for Academy Awards? J-Law, we bow down to thee.
10. The Place Beyond the Pines
Would be higher if not for a bit of disjointedness at the end. Director Derek Cianfrance has an incredibly distinct style, and I am looking forward to his future work. This movie increased by Ryan Gosling man-crush tenfold.
Honorable Mention: Frozen, Monsters University, Star Trek Into Darkness, World War Z
Still haven't seen: Captain Phillips, Blue Jasmine, 12 Years a Slave, Wolf of Wall Street, Inside Llewyn Davis, Dallas Buyers Club, Before Midnight
1. Gravity
Gravity is the reason why movie theaters still exist. The film is as gripping and intense a movie experience as any I have ever seen. Gravity uses the entirety of the screen to create a sense of isolation and dark out in the vastness in space. But not just a technical achievement, the film also has an emotionally resounding story involving the spiritual rebirth of Sandra Bullock's character. Her performance is an impressive near one-woman feat, as she spends almost 95% of the film on screen. I think that I ate maybe 2 handfuls of the popcorn I had during this movie; that's how high the intensity is. Usually I've chomped through the bucket before the opening credits can finish. Gravity will suck you in and not let go for an amazing 90 minutes.
2. Her
Emotionally complex and strange, Her is one of the most unique and inventive movies I've ever seen. Joaquin Phoenix, acting mostly alone on screen, falls in love with his "OS", or an artificially intellegent computer system. The film is neither championing or demonizing this type of relationship. It merely explores what our not too distant future looks like, and that the need for interaction in any form is something that humans will always crave. Director Spike Jonze normalizes the fact that people can gain emotional attachments based on text or voice alone, and not just in the stupid Catfish type way. People are using their computers to fall in love every day; what if the computer could be the one to fall in love with? Her will leave you pondering the nature of relationships and technology for a long time.
3. American Hustle
If you want to talk about a movie that is overloaded with talent, look no further. Directed by David O. Russell, and starring Christian Bale, Bradley Cooper, Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence, Louis C.K., and Jeremy Renner, American Hustle absolutely deserves all of its Oscar nominations for acting. The film is cool, sexy, and fast in all the right places. Bale playing such an iconic character like Batman for so long kind of made me forget how he is one of the best actors working today. American Hustle is one of those Forrest Gump/Ferris Bueller's Day Off type movies. EVERYONE will like it when they see it.
4. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Ah, The Hobbit. The book version is my favorite book of all time. Tolkien's adventure novel is pefect in almost every way, and I have read it many times. The films at first were very difficult for me to judge. They are totally different in tone than the book, which initially was off putting for me. However once realizing that these movies are more about creating prequels to The Lord of the Rings, something Tolkien's book never did, I began to enjoy them for what they are. The second installment of the prequel trilogy is just as impressive an adventure as the first, with a few unnecessary detours that brought it down a tick. The initial scene between Maritn Freeman's Bilbo and Smaug (voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch) is a high mark for not only this trilogy, but for The Lord of the Rings as well.
5. Pacific Rim
"A movie about giant monsters and robots made your top 10? Are you insane?" That's probably what you're thinking right now, but Pacific Rim is the epitome of a great action film. If a director decided to combine Godzilla and Transformers, but actually make them not suck, Pacific Rim would be the result. Plus look at the cast! Stringer Bell! Jax Teller! Charlie Kelly! Hellboy! The cast was basically an all star lineup of my favorite TV shows, which probably made it even more enjoyable for me. I readily admit that this film will not be for everybody, and shouldn't win any Oscars, but as a sci-fi action film? It's darn near perfect.
6. Elysium
District 9 was one of the most inventive science fiction films of the last 20 years, and director Neill Blomkamp's second film is a worthy follow up. The futurstic world envisioned is creative and depressing, but the story is one of hope. Matt Damon is great as the hero, but Sharlto Copley's villain steals every scene he is in. As far as sci-fi action movies go, Elysium is top notch.
7. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
Ben Stiller has only directed a few films (The Cable Guy, Zoolander, Tropic Thunder), and has never made one with any sort of emotional resonance, but Mitty finds a way to be funny and heartfelt. The story of a "boring" man taking an adventure is not really anything new, but Stiller plays the title character with such warmth that his story is endearing. The film really shines in its Indie soundtrack and how well it is shot and framed.
8. 42
Jackie Robinson is an American hero, and 42 is a faithful adaptation of his life. The film doesn't really take any risks except for the realistic rendering of the berating he takes at the hands of an opposing manager, played by Alan Tudyk. Jackie is one of my favorite athletes of all time, and his contribution to baseball and sports cannot be understated. Could you imagine watching professional sports that only had a bunch of white guys playing?
9. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Has there ever been a time in movie history where an actress is the lead of the biggest blockbuster film franchise, AND is perenially nominated for Academy Awards? J-Law, we bow down to thee.
10. The Place Beyond the Pines
Would be higher if not for a bit of disjointedness at the end. Director Derek Cianfrance has an incredibly distinct style, and I am looking forward to his future work. This movie increased by Ryan Gosling man-crush tenfold.
Honorable Mention: Frozen, Monsters University, Star Trek Into Darkness, World War Z
Still haven't seen: Captain Phillips, Blue Jasmine, 12 Years a Slave, Wolf of Wall Street, Inside Llewyn Davis, Dallas Buyers Club, Before Midnight
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